Post by conker the squirrel on Jan 8, 2007 14:23:47 GMT 10
Add your favourite conker quotes here!
I'll start this off:
Tedi 1: Really, that's incredible...
Tedi 2: What if you were to give this game to say... twenty intelligent people. I mean, what would that do? Let's face it, what would it do?
Tedi 1: Yes, that's very interesting...
[Conker loads machine guns]
Tedi 2: What the fuck? It's that bloody squirrel! Quick! Get into character!
Gregg: Conker! Conker! Conker! Yes you, boy! You're dead! You are dead! Dead as a dodo... dead as a... I can't be arsed with this bloody, ridiculous contraption! Whose idea was this anyway?... Right... hello... um... my name's Gregg... the Grim Reaper, and don't laugh!
Conker: Aren't you a little short to be a Grim Reaper?
Gregg: Well, how many Grim Reapers have you met before, mate? Well, what am I supposed to look like?
Conker: Yeah... that's a good point, and well made.
Gregg: Now... let's see... ah yes, Conker. Surname?
Conker: The Squirrel.
Gregg: The Squirrel... the... oh bloody hell, you would have to be a sodding squirrel, wouldn't you?
Conker: Why? Is there a problem with that?
Gregg: Well yes there is, actually! It's like those bloody cats! Such a pain in the arse! You're one of these special cases!
Conker: Oh really!
Gregg: Yes! Apparently, according to the powers that be... I'm just doing my job. I do what I'm told, and don't even get paid very much. Apprently, squirrels can have as many lives as they think they can get away with!
Conker: Oh, I see! So I'm not dead!
Gregg: You're dead, but not quite.
Conker: Huh! Right! I'll be off then!
Gregg: Tush! Just you wait, smartarse! You don't get out of that easily. Now, the thing is, you may not be dead, but that doesn't mean you can't die. You just have a few more, shall we say, chances. Yeah. Like cats! I hate those things! Right! Distributed around your little world are these tail things! Squirrels' tails. If you can get them, I'll give you an extra chance, understand?
Conker: Um... well... sounds a bit strange, but okay.
Gregg: Strange? It's the best bloody deal you're going to get, you little prick! Right! That's it! Piss off! I've got some cats to see! Bloody things... I hate those bloody cats... the way they meow and they piss everywhere... and their shit smells just bloody awful...
I'll start this off:
Tedi 1: Really, that's incredible...
Tedi 2: What if you were to give this game to say... twenty intelligent people. I mean, what would that do? Let's face it, what would it do?
Tedi 1: Yes, that's very interesting...
[Conker loads machine guns]
Tedi 2: What the fuck? It's that bloody squirrel! Quick! Get into character!
Gregg: Conker! Conker! Conker! Yes you, boy! You're dead! You are dead! Dead as a dodo... dead as a... I can't be arsed with this bloody, ridiculous contraption! Whose idea was this anyway?... Right... hello... um... my name's Gregg... the Grim Reaper, and don't laugh!
Conker: Aren't you a little short to be a Grim Reaper?
Gregg: Well, how many Grim Reapers have you met before, mate? Well, what am I supposed to look like?
Conker: Yeah... that's a good point, and well made.
Gregg: Now... let's see... ah yes, Conker. Surname?
Conker: The Squirrel.
Gregg: The Squirrel... the... oh bloody hell, you would have to be a sodding squirrel, wouldn't you?
Conker: Why? Is there a problem with that?
Gregg: Well yes there is, actually! It's like those bloody cats! Such a pain in the arse! You're one of these special cases!
Conker: Oh really!
Gregg: Yes! Apparently, according to the powers that be... I'm just doing my job. I do what I'm told, and don't even get paid very much. Apprently, squirrels can have as many lives as they think they can get away with!
Conker: Oh, I see! So I'm not dead!
Gregg: You're dead, but not quite.
Conker: Huh! Right! I'll be off then!
Gregg: Tush! Just you wait, smartarse! You don't get out of that easily. Now, the thing is, you may not be dead, but that doesn't mean you can't die. You just have a few more, shall we say, chances. Yeah. Like cats! I hate those things! Right! Distributed around your little world are these tail things! Squirrels' tails. If you can get them, I'll give you an extra chance, understand?
Conker: Um... well... sounds a bit strange, but okay.
Gregg: Strange? It's the best bloody deal you're going to get, you little prick! Right! That's it! Piss off! I've got some cats to see! Bloody things... I hate those bloody cats... the way they meow and they piss everywhere... and their shit smells just bloody awful...
